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Writer's pictureSarah

My user guide in 9 tips



I love the idea of writing a user manual for yourself and your optimal functionality, the way that Jay Desai and others have done. The goal: sum up the way you prefer to work and key facts for others to know. Here’s mine in 9 quick points.


1. My top 3 values


My highest personal values are authenticity, autonomy, and truth. I like people being themselves, having freedom, and pursuing a shared experience of reality. Anytime I have as much of these 3 values as possible, things tend to be good. Anytime I meet someone who aligns on these 3 values, we tend to get along really well. (Note: if you haven’t done the exercise of figuring out what your top values are, here’s a good way to do it.)


2. Be your true self


I don’t do well with bullshit artists or salespeople or politicians. You likely want something — I’m sure I do too — so just tell me what it is so we don’t sit here wasting each other’s time. I love people who are uniquely themselves, faults and all. Your weirdness is what makes you interesting. Let’s talk about who you are and what you like, not just the business part of your life.

“This above all: to thine own self be true.”

Polonius said that in Shakespeare’s Hamlet. I have this tattooed on me.


3. I’m an introvert


What this means:


  • I recharge my energy from being alone (as opposed to extroverts, who recharge their energy by being around others). Some people drain my energy very slowly, so I can be around them for long periods of time. Others are more tiring.

  • Meetings are generally tiring. The more people in a meeting, the more I tend to fade into the background.

  • I dislike interrupting people and will try to find a natural break to talk.

  • I only talk when I have something that feels important to say, and I get annoyed with people who talk for the sake of talking.

  • I like being around people without the pressure or requirement to talk. E.g., multiple people working at a coffee shop or on someone’s couch.


What this does not mean:


  • I am antisocial

  • I have low EQ or empathy


4. I’m not going to hire you as a VC or meet with you on that


See this article with my best advice on it and know that it’s not advantageous for us to meet or talk about this. Here’s a version for college students. Here’s a version for lawyers.


5. I love personality models


I’m a co-founder of Blueprint Enneagram and have been working with the Enneagram personality system for about ten years. It’s the most accurate and useful way I’ve ever found to truly understand yourself and others. Knowing it is having a superpower.

I’m an Enneagram 8 with a 9 wing and an INTJ in the MBTI. They give a good shorthand explanation of my personality tendencies. If I know what yours are, I’ll immediately have a much better sense of who you are. I’m pretty much always interested to know that and talk about it.


6. Experts are the best


I love people who know their shit. There is nothing more interesting to me than an expert who really gets something and can go deep in that subject. This can be your job, sure, but also a subreddit you moderate or a movie genre you’re obsessed with or a trend you know way too much about. This includes being an expert on yourself. People who don’t know themselves (and aren’t willing to get to know themselves, including by looking honestly at their flaws and shadows) are not my cup of tea.


7. Meetings: purposeful and short


Let’s keep them as short as possible. Set an agenda and goal if you’re the one making the meeting. Be prepared to justify why every person invited is essential to the meeting, not just nice to have. If a meeting is going amazingly well, let’s go over time. If we’ve reached the goal, let’s end it early. Arbitrariness sucks.


In the hierarchy of meeting formats, I pretty much always want to move lower in this list:

[👇🏻 More effort to schedule/more exhausting for introverts]


  • In person

  • Video call

  • Audio call

  • Email

  • Text/DM/audio message


[👆🏻 Less effort to schedule/less exhausting for introverts]


My nemesis is that guy who’s always trying to “jump on a call” when a single text can accomplish whatever it is.


8. I am not polished


I drop F-bombs. I go to meetings in workout clothes. I’m a believer in psychedelics. I don’t follow rules that are stupid. I don’t mind if you do these things. I will probably like you more if you do.


9. Engage me on things that matter


My current view of existence is that we’re all tiny sparks of life that come from a single consciousness, making us (and all matter) all interconnected. Efforts to divide us are inorganic and illusory. We all have it within us to surpass polarization.


I feel like my purpose on this earth is to reduce chaos, suffering, and confusion via the interactions I have with people and the companies that I help come into existence. I like to nudge people in directions that feel more aligned with their best selves. In every transaction I have, I’m looking to tip the scales in favor of utility, efficiency, and goodness. I love working on projects and with people who make this connection clear from the beginning. Freedom of speech, meritocracy, love, and individuality mean a lot to me.


As you can see if you made it this far, I really like efficiency. Thus I wish everyone had a user guide. If you do and we work together currently, we did in the past, or we may in the future, send me yours: I’m sarah(at)accomplice(dot)co.

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